User Profile

Character Demographics:
Fandom: the Ad-Ventures series of short stories by Boston Baker
Name: Josephine "Joe" Parker
Age: 28
Physical Appearance: Average height, lanky, dark hair, dark eyes.
Education: Questionably-obtained journalism degree.
Occupation: Copywriter for Martin, Roberts, and Holliday advertising firm.
Significant Other: No, thank you.
Sexual Preference: Yes. (Mostly straight)


Character Biography:
History: Grew up in a small Midwestern town, moved to the City and worked her way up from coffee girl to copywriter despite her best efforts.
Personality in seven words or less: Why don'tcha just get to know me?
How Others Perceive Your Character: Like a cigar-smoking Kate Hepburn, but with less tits, if that's possible.
Beliefs, Convictions, Morals: No, thanks.
Reason(s) for Escaping to Canada: It was an Amelia Earhart event. Flyin' in my little plane and hit a bump in the space-time continuum.
Their DHAs [Dreams, Hopes, and Aspirations] for Canada: Overthrow the Queen through proper use of apostrophes.


Twenty-Questions for the Characters:

[Note: These can be one word answers or fragments. If any of you've seen Lipton's 'ITAS' you know how this works]

1. What turns them on: Big radial engines.
2. What turns them off: Improper apostrophes.
3. Would they see a shrink: If by "shrink" you mean "bottle of bourbon," yes.
4. Worst Childhood experience: All of them.
5. Favorite Film: Sheik of Araby
6. Favorite Song: The Hotfoot Strut
7. Favorite Word: If I wrote it my editors would fire me.
8. Least Favorite Word: "Miss," because it always comes in front of my name and that always comes in front of editors yelling at me.
9. Favorite Curse Word: See (7)
10. Best gift ever received: Flying lessons.
11. Sound or Noise they hate: Ace Bravo's voice.
12. Sound or Noise they love: Ace Bravo's voice.
13. Do they know the answer to 64 million dollar question: No, but i can talk you into buying it.
14. [Complete the sentence] ... All the world's a stage... Yeah, yeah, Shakespeare. He's overrated. They don't let me make up words.
15. Did Yoko Ono really break up the Fab Four: Do I care?
16. Chuck Norris or Bruce Lee: Which has better odds?
17. Half full or half empty: Give me the bottle.
18. Coke or Pepsi: Coke. With real coke in it, please.
19. If they were a Jellybean flavor, which one: Do they come in bourbon?
20. And, finally, if Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? I thought San' Pete was the gatekeeper. But I'd like to hear God say "I saw your ad for Hell. How much for a vacation house?"

Friends (2):

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